It all started way back in 2003. I was living the self-sufficient dream at Vajradhara Gonpa in the jungle-clad hills of sub-tropical Australia when my Bhutanese meditation teacher, Dzongsar Khyentse Rinpoche, accepted a dinner invitation. At some point, he nipped out to use our home-built composting toilet, and I guess he was impressed – so impressed that 11 years later, when I asked if he needed help with any volunteer jobs, he recalled the occasion.
“I have a monastery in Eastern Bhutan,” he told me. “We have enough toilets for the monks, but when we hold a big ceremony, there are so many visitors who make a terrible mess with their business. Can you build an ecologically sustainable toilet as an example to the villagers?”
Holy crap
“Ah, I’m better with solar than with faeces….”
“Electricity is not important,” he assured me. “Not while South Asia is drowning in its own shit.”
“So…..how many people are we talking about?” I hesitate to ask.
“We don’t know – about 5000….maybe ten.” Oh dear, that is a lot of pooh.
Although this sounded like a shitty task, the Himalayan kingdom of Bhutan is a wonderful place, which usually costs USD250 per day just to visit, so I agreed to give it a try. I mean – how hard could it be?
Famous last words
In April 2014 I made my first visit to the charming Chokyi Gyatso Institute in Bhutan’s remote far-east. I found a picturesque monastery which clings to the side of a precipitous ridge high above the hamlet of Dewathang. With every inch of usable land already occupied with buildings, I was offered an impossibly steep site 100 metres down a treacherous track from the lowest building in the complex. The monk in charge of construction assured me that with retaining walls and a decent staircase, they could create a workable site. I reluctantly agreed, then tasked him with site preparation.
What could possibly go wrong?
I returned in January 2015 to discover that the monks had engaged some local stone masons to build their own wayward idea of composting chambers, despite having not even seen my plans. They had also poured a slab on top, and were about to set to work on the building above. An engineer quickly determined that compost toilet mark 1 would collapse under its own weight in no time, so I ordered its demolition and engaged a building contractor.
If at first you don’t succeed….
Three months is a very short time in Bhutan, but we managed to get a fair portion of the building completed before my visa expired, so I left the crew there to finish off the job. Meanwhile, I had time to write this little ditty about my time there.
Dewathang Ditty (The Rice Song) by Simon Thomas
Disaster strikes
Dewathang is one of the wettest towns on earth with an annual rainfall is 5.5 metres. The great flood of July 2015 was quite an event, and the resulting landslide ran straight through the nearly completed toilet block mark 2, destroying it beyond repair.
Turd time lucky
On my next visit, I was pleasantly surprised to be offered another site, closer to the temple and somewhat more stable than the first. Due to the complications of getting anything done in this far away outpost, my visa again expired shortly after construction began. The plan was that I should return before the first usage of the facility to prepare the compost chambers with organic material, and check that the work had been properly completed. I was shocked some time later to be informed that the toilets had been opened up for use, and that they were getting rather smelly. No wonder! Without the correct preparation, they were crapping into an empty concrete room.
The final preparation
So it was that in December 2017, I headed back to Dewathang to sort out the mess. After a month of repairing faults and problems, almost 4 years since the original idea was flown, I handed over the keys to what probably qualifies as the most expensive toilet in Bhutan!
These monks are stars!
As part of the Lhomon Education initiative, I was invited to conduct a song writing workshop with the young monks at the institute. Check out this great song which they wrote and performed themselves to celebrate the theme of healthy living. Please share!
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Losar, or new year is celebrated in Eastern Bhutan on the first day of the 12th month of the Tibetan calendar, rather than the first day of the first month like in most other places, for reasons now shrouded in history.
This year, Dzongsar Jamyang Khyenste Rinpoche (absent abbot of the Chokyi Gyatso Institute) recommended that the resident monks invite all who wish to come from the local villages around to enjoy festivities at their hillside monastery overlooking the rustic hamlet of Dewathang. The little community of 140 or so buzzed with excitement as the preparations took place in the days leading up to the event. This included plenty of practice of the popular local sport “khuru” which was to be a major focus of the Losar activities. In this game, massive (usually home-made) darts are lobbed across a distance of some 40 metres at a tiny target nestled inside a wooden frame festooned with luxuriant leaves and multi-coloured ribbons. It is not so easy to even strike this little board from such a distance, let alone score a bull’s eye so each successful throw is celebrated vociferously with a ritual song and dance. Following this, the lucky player is awarded a long wide ribbon to hang around their waist in a colour corresponding to the spot where their dart struck the target. Those whose throws become too wayward, by contrast, are landed with a large phallic object to hang from their belt supposedly to ward off the evil spirits which are obviously inhibiting their success. The monks used a long dangling purple eggplant for such purpose!
A major part of the fun is for people not involved in the game to crowd around the target, gesturing and taunting as the player is taking aim only to scatter like bunnies if the airborne missile soars off in their direction. Mind you, I noticed that men seem far more likely to to engage in this activity – the women preferring to keep a sensible distance away.
When the big day arrived, people began to stream in from miles around, most of them dressed in fine brilliantly coloured hand loom garments as tradition would dictate. The first feast of the day for a visitor like myself was one for the eyes.
Important item number one on the Losar agenda was the blessing of the ladies Khuru teams by the charming and ever humble resident teacher Khenpo Sonam Tashi.
And so the games began!
At midday, the gathered crowd (numbering in the hundreds) were treated to a scrumptious meal, prepared and served by the monks themselves who, contrary to tradition, were the last to eat. The tall stately temple with its intricate gold relief sculptures juxtaposed against the simplicity of smooth sandstone Buddha images was lined with mats and carpets to become an impromptu eating hall.
The afternoon saw endless more rounds of khuru, enough snacks to feed the Bhutanese army as well as generous portions of beer and locally brewed alcohol such as arah, barley beer and a strange lumpy rice wine called, appropriately enough, “chang-kee.”
As the short winter day drew to a close, we were mesmererised by a gorgeous fiery sunset which cast soothing pastel shades on the tall hills around and the vast Indian plains spreading out below.
Finally, a huge bonfire was lit and we were treated to song, dance and even a little rap deep into the night performed by monks, local villagers and even a couple of stray foreigners.
It was a joyous and wonderful occasion, surely a fitting way to welcome in the new year.
Early morning wake up time is hailed by the thin mournful cry of a bugle pushing its way up through this dense dank atmosphere. The sound climbs the curves and cascades of the creek, pushing ever higher up the mountainside from an army encampment couched deep in the valley floor below. Finally, it pierces the thin metal framed pane of glass above my warm cosy bed, urging me to pull aside the curtain and see what this day should bring.
This is not the dawn I know from home. In Australia, dawn is a parakeet, stretching her vast vibrantly coloured wings, arching from one end of the earth to the next, hiding her head all the while. Unseen yet utterly apparent. Our ancient gnarled land glows a thousand tones in anticipation of her advent and even the merest wisp of a cloud bursts brilliantly into flame to herald her arrival. Then suddenly, almost from nowhere, she raises one bright burning searing eye above the scrubby hilltops as though challenging me to a staring match which only she can ever win.
Here, in the unelectrified night of remote Eastern Bhutan and with the early onset of summer rains, dank folds of monsoon push an eiderdown of ghostly steam into every fault and seam of the mighty Himalayan range. As the darkness yields to dawn’s subtle yet relentless approach, ridges arise from the gloom wearing wooly blankets of white while tall elegant peaks sport thin transparent mantles around their shoulders as though protecting themselves against the creeping damp. Dawn seeps into this valley from the vast empty plains below – refracted from one tiny droplet to the next a million billion trillion times until she is robbed of every living hue and stands alone as light at its purest and most diffuse. Fog so imbued with her luminescence infiltrates my lungs, creeping through cracks and sneaking under doors, passing gaps in the eaves and down though the ceiling till it comes to rest in every filament and fibre of every single garment that I own.
The birds rejoice none the less. Another dangerous night in the jungle survived. Now they can see and now they are free to fly. Nothing can catch them on their swift wings and they chatter playfully to one another in bright cheerful calls.
As the last notes of the First Post carry on climbing to the cool rocky peaks above, an new resonance – deep, strange and haunting moves through earth, air and building alike to arrive in my body and ears at once. Like a didgeridoo from deep down in the ground, the lama’s longhorns bring one section of their puja to a noisy close. Next the thin reedy call of the Tibetan oboes and the booming of the bass drums echo up the valley like palls of the thunder dragon after which this country takes it’s local name.
I glance at my clock, 5am – still time to visit the gonpa before I take the bus. In this country of mountains, everything is either up or down so I scale flight after steep flight of concrete steps to arrive at the spacious lha khang on top of the even bigger temple. I peek through the heavy brightly painted open door into the dim cavernous space beyond and my senses are overwhelmed with rich odours. Incense, sandalwood, musty old tapestries and the waxy smell of oil from dozens of flickering light offerings which adorn the elaborate shrine. Large gold and brass statues of Buddhas and deities glint in the dancing play of light and shadow from the lamps as the music and chanting reaches another crescendo. Finally, a vacant lull heralds the next stage of the ceremony and the participants notice my arrival. Friendly monks beckon me to sit beside them, wriggling over to make a space on the thin seating cushion atop of a cold polished stone floor.
I am completely absorbed. Bells jangle in my ears and vivid colourful images of deities and protectors glare down at me from the walls – some soothing and serene, others wrathful and terrifying. Slowly, I begin to breathe in time with the rhythm of the slow monotonous monastic chant and it feels as though something in my heart is resonating with the pure energy that these people are creating, even though I can not understand the words.
I savour that moment by moment.
Today I will be leaving this enchanted monastery in the foothills of the Himalaya overlooking the great plains of India. Leaving the steep verdant mountains – richly timbered with dense, luxuriant tropical rainforest. Leaving a place where almost everyone I see beams me a rich genuine smile almost every time I see them.
Revently, I back out of the lha khang, descend ever so many concrete staircases, gather up my belongings and with the gracious aid of a couple of monks, walk the kilometer or so down their steep gravel driveway to the main road below.
Today I am taking the bus to Thimpu.